The Quality of Life...

Thur 6th Nov 2008

So sorry for the lack of entries since my last effort...nothing much had happened around these parts...

Therefore, to prevent any wrong misconceptions of my personal well-being, me thought me had better allay all "fears" of my long absence! Nope, me not kicked the proverbial bucket yet! Ha ha....

Well, latest news that kinda "shocked" the world was that of Obama winning the 2008 Elections in USA...truly history in the making! For the first time, an Afro-American has become the President-elect of USA & who will be installed in Jan 2009 as the new 44th President of the USA!! Living proof that nothing is impossible in this world...

And he won...mainly because ppl in USA wanted CHANGE...a real change in the way their lives are being affected by the ppl in power! Yes, WE can! Said the Americans.

Now, back home here in Malaysia, can we? Can we have a real change...changes to how our lives are being affected by our politicians and the powers that be? Mutual respect between all the peoples in Malaysia?

In my lifetime? Nope. Don't think nor believe so. We hear a lot of ppl saying lots of things. However, in practice, me feel that those ppl were just practising their rhetoric abilities. Ha ha! We are way way behind the USA...in almost everything. Sorry...but the truth hurts. Sad but true.

Anyway, to be more close to home, our own lives are still what they are. Family relationships are still very uncertain...being controlled by so many factors.

For instance, every parent hopes & wishes for their kids to grow up & be successful in their own lives. Each parent takes care, nurtures, protects their kids the best way they could...hoping that they would one day be able to relax & enjoy whatever is left of their lives..in peace, happiness & with luck in relatively good comfort. But do their hopes & wishes come true?

That depends. Depends on lots of factors. I've found out the hard way that upbringing alone does not leave a strong enough imprint in the young minds to ensure such an achievement nor realisation of such hopes & wishes.

A parent normally hopes that when his son gets married, he would not be losing his son but gaining a daughter-in-law!

However, a son who marries, might be "lost" as quoted in a much-repeated Chinese saying...

that a son would no longer be a son but become only the husband to his wife after his marriage.

It would be worse, if the wife he marries, has a worse family background & worse parent relationship than your son. For then all would be lost! No son. No daughter-in-law. Sad but true. The risks are very high these days.

Similarly, in the olden days, a daughter who takes a husband might be compared to "water in a basin that is thrown out..." Like quoted in a current Taiwan serial over Astro's HHD Channel...Mother's Home. However, to the parents, the daughter's family home would always be her home. That is, should she feel the need to come home.

To my kids, I've always told them that the doors to our home would always be open to them if they feel that our home is still their home & part of their lives. They have the keys. Only 1 condition. Come HAPPY!

Inversely, if they don't feel that our home is still their home & that we are still their parents, all such rights to enter would be withdrawn. One cannot treat one's parents disrespectfully and expect to be treated well. Love for one's parents is either in one's heart or not. Such feelings can never be forced nor be an pretense. Love & respect in a family is a 2-way emotion. Period.

I thank God that these past few weeks have been kind to me. Peace & Happiness....my birthday wish... seems to have been heard. And hopefully, too, my other half's added wish...Good Health, would be a great added blessing indeed.

So, earlier during dinner today, a phrase uttered during a documentary on TV caught our ears. "Live Life to the fullest! " And I commented, "Maybe we should live our lives to the fullest..."

"That's what you wish for," my other half added. "But if you live your life to the fullest, then you would not be happy should there be a downturn in your life! When you have nothing left to fall back on."

So, poor lil ole me had to correct myself...adding that we could only live our lives to the fullest within our true capabilities & not beyond our means. That way we could be happy & still be "safe"....if you know what I mean.

In other words, do live life in the best possible way...be happy with what you have. Accept what cannot be yours to have. There is this "10/90 Philosophy" that I read in a Blog I frequent. In short, it means you cannot control 10% of whatever happens in your life but the remaining 90% ie how you react, is what you can control. And that could make your life a better & happier one.

Yup, I've learnt that and am now controlling how me react to "bad" events in my life. Never let such "bad" events affect your happiness. You don't need them! Find your own happiness. That's exactly what me am doing these days...so far so good. Thank God!

Be happy! Have a happy weekend!